So, January, we meet again...

Well, it's that time - the time to jump on the bandwagon (and live up to the title of my blog) and post my many reflective "musings" regarding the ups and downs of the past year and my hopes and goals for the next. I don't really enjoy jumping onto bandwagons as such, but I can see why all of this list-making and reflecting is going on, as it's the start of a new year - essentially a turning point in time, or a starting point from which to begin again depending on how you look at it.

In any case, I suppose my mind is as ripe with reflection as the next person's at this time (though really my mind is like this pretty much on a daily basis regardless of the date on the calendar). I can safely say that 2009 was one of the most tumultuous years of my life to date - I experienced a few large life changes which left me reeling (in good and bad ways) but also taught me invaluable lessons about life and myself. I hate to sound so cheesy but sometimes the truth really IS cheesy.

I've been stressed, sad, tired, excited and reckless. Many people have left my life and a few others have entered it. I definitely feel that my personality and attitude has changed - I've become more confident, more independent (who would have thought THAT was possible?!), more patient, and more self-aware. I feel as though I'm being carried into 2010 on a positive wave, stemming from these changes in my awareness and psyche. And that makes me happy. And hopeful. I've realized there is a lot that I don't know but that's ok, and I've realized that I am a very lucky person with a life that I'm 99% very happy about and grateful for. And it's a life that I've built for myself and I'm proud of myself for that.

I could go on and on waxing poetic about all of the specific achievements and events from the past year and essentially put my entire personal life ala the past 12 months up for scrutiny to the entire interwebs, but I've always been more of a "big picture" person so I'm settling for the posting of a few general impressions from the year that speak to me most.

I could also go on and on with specificity (is that a word, because if not it should be!) about the NEXT 12 months and all the things I plan to do but if I've learned anything in the past few years it's that you never know what's coming around the corner and all you can really do is make assumptions, dream and hope. I certainly have hopes, dreams and obligations for the next year already in my head - eating better (I know everyone says they should do this and I'm notorious for not being able to stick with this, but I REALLY need to!) working hard at the last 6 mths of my job, watching and helping my best friend get married, take a trip or a class or two (or 5), and possibly make my first move away - but regardless of what happens or doesn't, I'm confident that this will be the most exciting year yet. Because I'm going to make it that way. Or at least try to.

For the most part, I'm just going to try to take life one day at a time, not stress or worry more than I need to, be as outgoing as I can even if it scares the shit out of me, help others more, procrastinate less, and tell and show the people I care about how much I love them as much as I can. Perhaps these are silly, lofty, unrealistic goals and I will probably forget about them by the time Valentine's Day rolls around, but I figure it's the intention that matters and it's a good place to start!

Happy New Year to you and yours - I hope you are as excited by this new year as I am and that at least some of your hopes and dreams come true for you.

Some milestones of this year:
> Moved in to my first apartment (and moved in with a boyfriend)
> Adopted my brother's cat
> Bought furniture for the first time ever
> Was let go from a job and was unemployed for the first time ever (and coincidentally my first job after graduating from University)
> Had my first ever dinner party
> Became single again for the first time in a year and a half
> Took my first ever business trip
> Went back to the Tattoo choir after a 2 yr hiatus
> Had an article published in a local magazine & published my first public newsletter
> Bought a new laptop
> Met new friends, lost old ones, rediscovered and cultivated my love for writing, ate at a lot of restaurants, drank a lot of coffee, went to a lot of movies and concerts, laughed and cried, and most of all learned, grew and gained confidence and clarity.